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2 Girls, 2 Boys and a whole lot of noise.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

The last 6 months

There is a lot that I could say about the last 6months. I have no pictures. I have nothing to show for this lapse in time. My kids are older and bigger. My heart has been softened and humbled.
I have dreaded writing this blog, but I would like to focus on the happier things that have happened and not the sad, so I write tonight so that I can move on.
I want to say how much I love my sister. I have missed you. I took you for granted. I didn't tell you how much I appreciated all the things you did for my family and especially for Kaitlynn. You were the highlight of our lives and I wish I would have told you that more. I am working on taking your happy attitude with me and being a little more like you. It took me a few months but I realized that I don't have to feel like a victim and be miserable all the time. There are many difficult things that have been out of my control, but that doesn't mean that blessings aren't there and that we haven't been loved. I am grateful for the memories and all the pictures - and some of your clothes. :) I feel how much I love you so much more now. I wish that things were different, but I have had the opportunity to see miracles in other ways. I think about you all the time. I love you Aimers and I cannot wait to see you again. Until next time...

So Jeremy lost his job in January. Amy died in a plane crash 3 weeks later. My kids had pneumonia shortly after that. There was so much to deal with and my parents... well, it has been difficult. I felt justified in jumping off Locust Grove bridge one night over a fight with Jeremy regarding a banana cream pie. Alas, I have come back to my senses and things are somewhat better - at least my burden feels lighter and I have different eyes to look at the world with.
We are currently looking into the Air Force and will hear back from them in September, so for now-we wait. I have my part time job and unemployment, so we are getting by.
I have had an outpour of people concerned for us and serving us. Many people who we hardly know that well. It has been amazing.

I am grateful for my family and friends, my ward family, and all who have expressed sympathy and love to my family and I. I hate boring blogs, but sometimes it is nice to know what is really going on with people, so there you go.
Recent news - Cody had croup, and then got his finger caught in the hinge side of the door and had to be rushed to the ER to get stitches, but it was 5 days before insurance ran out, so I will call that even. He will get his stitches out on Friday.

Jeremy and I are playing on an indoor soccer league. I am making up for all the years that I sucked at soccer and now my dad even comes to the games and doesn't think they are boring. Time is a crazy thing. Oh, and Jeremy is pretty good for never having played before.

My next blog will have pictures and stories and less tears. My sweet cousins gave me a camera so I have been taking pictures of my kids again. I'm sad to miss out on the last 6 months of growth but I am grateful to be here now.

Thank you to all who read this silly blog. And to Amy...adeiu.